{7Quick Takes} Weekly mishmash: Vol 16

Oh Lordy it has been awhile since I’ve been on here.  Lots of stuff happenin’, lots of craziness as usual.  Check in with Kelly and then enjoy my 7QTs:

ONE.

Spring has finally sprung, to put that silly little adage to use.  I love to see all the verdant life coming up everywhere.  This year Hubby took some of our scrap metal and made a huuuuuuge garden box that sits now off of our back deck.  We have planted herbs, lettuce, and tomatoes here.  The idea being this will serve as our “kitchen garden” so I don’t have to run all the way across the yard to our larger patch.  (When it comes to gardening, I am lazy.  The easier and closer it is for me to care for and harvest my produce, the better.) We’ve also created a starter “Fairy garden” in the garden box for the kids.  They seem to enjoy it:-)

TWO.

Hubby is always bugging me to take more of an interest in yard maintenance.  It’s not that I don’t want to help, it’s just that I am usually preoccupied with children’s needs and mountains of laundry.  Last week I decided that since Evvie was down for a nap and Spike was enthralled in Netflix, I would take this year’s maiden voyage with the John Deere riding lawnmower.  To help Hubby out and also because the grass was looking a bit on the shaggy side.  Well, toward the end of my grass-cutting adventure, I inadvertently drove into a cleverly-concealed hole just big enough to entirely swallow my right front wheel.  Needless to say, that tractor is heavy.  I managed to push it out of the hole, but I noticed hours later the forearm above my wrist was swelling up with a giant bulge of pain.  I thought I might have a stress fracture or something.  The good news: the urgent care PA said it was just tendonitis.  Also good news: Hubby may be a little less harpy about me helping in the yard since, after all, I did help.  I helped so hard I had to go to the doctor.  And that is hard core.

THREE

My oldest, Junior, just turned 10.  I think I have mentioned previously that he has, to date, been our most difficult child.  He has always been more intense, more destructive, and much more moody than any of our other children (to date…Evvie is showing signs of being the same way, but this could just be a result of being 2…hard to tell….)  After a pretty stressful weekend, Junior came home from school earlier in the week with a massive chip on his shoulder and spare anger for everyone within throwing distance.  After talking with him on the way to his karate class, Hubby determined that Junior feels left out and ….gulp…bullied at school.  Now, Junior tends to be a little melodramatic, often erring on the side of negativity.  Whenever I visit the school or ask his teacher how he’s doing socially, everything seems fine.  Kids sit by him at lunch.  They say hello to him in the halls.  But clearly something is not right if he comes home from school and takes his anger out on everyone so forcefully.  I think one of the hardest thing about being a parent is trying to figure out what the right course of action is when your child is having a hard time.  Sometimes it can take years of trial and error before finally finding a solution that works.  And it is hard to be patient when your child is in emotional pain.  But I guess the way forward is to try some things, perhaps meeting yet again with the school counselor, trying to teach Junior ways to manage his anxiety and anger, maybe seeing a professional therapist.  We’ll keep you posted.

FOUR

3 Months to Europe!  I am getting pretty excited.  This summer up until then is jam-packed with activities, so I am probably going to be mentally and physically wrapped up with those for the first few weeks.  But I feel pretty ready: everything is booked, reserved, and planned.  I gotta figure out the whole cell-phone-in-Europe thing, but that is about the last thing on my to-do list.  Super duper excited!!!!

FIVE

I mentioned above that Hubby has been nagging me more and more about helping him out with the yard-work.  I don’t blame him; we live on 2 acres of a yard we’re still trying to tame into shape after buying the property just under three years ago.  My issue is that if I devote a large amount of time to helping outside the house, the inside things that need to be done DON’T GET DONE.  Home ownership is hard work.  It’s a trade-off in the attention department, too.  What I mean is, when I spend all afternoon weeding the wilderness mess that is my front flower bed, that is time taken away from doing something else equally fun, like scrubbing the bathtub.  So prioritization is a MUST!  In my book, things like tilling the garden for the 57th time rank lower than say, trying to deal with the mountainous pile of laundry that is now in my bedroom.  The tasks around the house are never going to disappear.  Grass will always need to be mowed.  Weeds will always need to be pulled.  Laundry will always need folding.  Butts will always need changing (well, it feels like anyway…#notpottytrainednottrying).  I think Hubby’s and my solution is to sit down together and prioritize the housework, yardwork and maintenance and then do what we can and not stress about the things that don’t get done.

SIX

I am not the best dog owner.  I love my dog, and he gets all of his needs met, but usually at the end of the day if I have one more creature demading anything from me, I can’t take it.  So he gets most of his attention from the kids.  But, sometimes, when you wake up in the morning and step in a large warm puddle of doggy diarrhea, the animal-lover in me does an about-face and I mutter under my breath that I wish I had reconsidered my decision to adopt a shelter dog 13 years ago.  Of course it wasn’t my dog’s fault: he had picked up some sort of stomach bug.  But after spending two full days cleaning up foul-smelling liquid poopie off the carpet (interspersed with human toddler diaper needs) I was through with that s**t.  Is it too much to ask to get a break from poop?  I think I am going to ask for that for Mother’s Day. (note: Winston the dachshund is doing much better, thank you.  The vet gave him some great drugs to get his bowel operating normally again.  Praise be!)

SEVEN

Existential question of the week: Will my van ever be clean?

 

Have a great week!

{7QuickTakes} Weekly mishmash: Depression sucks edition

So, spring is finally here but…ugh…gray, cloudy, and rainy days are making my spirits droop.  Which reminds me of the insidiousness of the depression I suffer from and how I need to constantly be on my guard.  Here’s some ins and outs of the past week feeling not-quite-100%:

ONE.

So our little spring break trip up to Jackson was -eh- fun.  But a far cry from the relaxing vacation I was anticipating it was going to be.  We did some cool things, and saw some neat animals, but I was struggling the whole time to keep from crying.  Hubby was pretty sure it was PMS (and don’t you know how delighted women are when you point that out to them, hmmmm?) even though I don’t know if you can claim that for an entire month of crabbiness.  Anyhow, I snapped at my kids and felt myself wanting to cry through much of the trip.  I kept thinking, “I need a vacation” even though I was on vacation!

TWO.

It’s a bad idea to skip medications.  I never forget to take my antidepressants on purpose, but sometimes I am just so exhausted at the end of the day that I forget.  And it usually happens that I’ll be feeling fine…..feeling fine….feeling fine….HIT A BRICK WALL.  And that is when I stop and ask myself if I have been taking my meds faithfully.  And the answer is generally no.  I need to come up with a better system to remind myself…such as a phone reminder or sticky note on my mirror.

THREE.

We weren’t meant to parent alone.  And with Hubby working 14-hour-days as part of his current crazy schedule, I never see him and he gets home after the kids are in bed.  This is stressful for both of us.  Single parents out there, I salute you!  I don’t know how you do it!  I just got to the point this week where I felt like ALL I DID WAS YELL.  And I felt like a terrible parent.  I stopped at one point and realized I wasn’t enjoying my children.  At all.  My days just felt like a long loop of feed the kids, pick up after the kids, listen to the kids fight, yell at the kids to pick up their stuff and not fight, put the kids to bed while tripping over Legos and crayons strewn all over my messy messy house.

I don’t really have a solution to this malaise I find myself in right now with regard to motherhood, but believe you me, I am having these lurid fantasies of having a nanny who comes over for two hours in the afternoon, teaches my children foreign languages while helping them finish their homework and who lets me take a nap!

FOUR.

My house smells like pee.  The four-year-old is *potty-trained*.  But I use that definition very loosely.  I will pass Spike while I am tearing through the house cleaning up some mess or other, and ask, “Did you pee your pants?  You smell like pee.”  And he will say, “Well, I just dribbled a little.”  I might be completely daft, but my definition of “dribble” does not consist of a football-sized wet spot on the crotch of one’s trousers.  ???

FIVE.

Sometimes I feel like running away.  Not to anyplace exotic or far.  Just to Barnes & Noble.  By myself.

SIX.

For those of you who have loved ones who suffer from depression:  It is not helpful when you say something along the lines of, ” Well, you can be bummed out today, but I expect you to get yourself together to not drag the whole family down this weekend.”  I love my husband but sometimes…like I said….not helpful.

SEVEN.

Something to say that would be helpful for a depressed, overwhelmed, and trying to dig herself-out-of-a-hole-of-despair wife and mother:

“I’m here for you.”

“I understand you probably want some alone time right now.  I would be happy to take the kids off your hands so you can do whatever you need to do to get yourself feeling better again.”

“What is something I could do in the future to help you out so you don’t get so low again?”

My current depression, which I would describe as a malaise, is not life-threatening or hospital-stay-inducing, thank God.  It is managed beautifully on medication 99% of the time.  I am just a little low.  And my personality makes it very difficult to ask for help when I need it.  But I think I need a little help right now to get back to being me.

 

Hopefully next week will be better!  Don’t forget to head over to Kelly’s to see what everybody else is up to!

 

{7QuickTakes} Spring Break Edition

The calendar finally says it’s spring!  Hooray!  Be sure to check with Kelly to see if everyone else over there is as excited about it as I am!

Here’s what has been going on here lately:

ONE.

This last week was my older children’s spring break.  Because Hubby had to work most of the week (ugh…he is on an insane schedule currently!) we were only able to take a few days away.  Our destination: Jackson Hole, Wyoming.

I am a mountain girl and I love me some Tetons.  We stayed up at the ski resort but, mainly due to the expense, did not downhill ski.  We settled for going into Grand Teton National Park and doing some cross-country skiing.  This was the first time Spike got on a pair of skis and he was a trooper!

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The couple that skiis together…is probably yelling at their kids through the course of this photo shoot because the oldest is hogging the camera, the middle two want to take pictures too, and the youngest one is trying to eat something in the snow that looks suspiciously like a chocolate egg but is more likely elk poo.

TWO.

This Lenten fast from alcohol is hard for me, not gonna lie.  Before, I enjoyed my glass of wine with dinner most nights and usually a cocktail or two on the weekends.  It was something I looked forward to.  Especially after a long day of dealing with the demands of several small (and oftimes crabby) people.  And now, I realize, maybe my alcohol consumption was tipping the scales at being a little too much.  Particularly because I miss it so much after only a few weeks of abstaining!  Yikes.  But maybe that is good.  To step back and reassess exactly how much I had been drinking.  Along with that, just to see if I can fill my craving for something more healthy (or…how about spiritual…since this is Lent, after all?).  But still it is hard.  I absolutely love wine.400px-glass_of_red_wine

THREE.

Earlier this week the two younger ones helped me clean.  I have to remember that it is the effort that counts.  Even if I have to clean up after them cleaning up.

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This is right before she ran off to do something else and slipped dramatically in her puddle of doom.

FOUR.

My framing project of a few weeks back is complete!  I ended up ordering a custom frame for the oddly-shaped oblong poster (which STILL wound up costing around $70 – AND I had to assemble it myself) and then bought a $15 poster frame at Michael’s for the other one.  The problem was this generic frame was slightly too big and I was faced with the problem of trying to make my own mat.  I had initially thought of buying matting board and cutting it to size, but ended up using a burlap ribbon I had lying around.  I glued it onto the backing and it seemed to work OK.  I was worried it was going to look goofy, but I am pretty happy with how it turned out.

FIVE.

Evvie (at 2 years 2 months) is currently in the violent throws of the Terrible Twos.  Today she had a knock-down drag out tantrum because I refused to let her play with a colorful feminine sanitary product she found in my purse.  This morning at breakfast she was upset that she wasn’t permitted to eat off her sister’s plate. She tossed her bacon onto the floor in disgust, loudly proclaimed, “No WAY, Mom!”  After a two-second pout, she announced, “I hung-y” (toddler speak for “hungry”), climbed down off her chair and, before I could stop her, grabbed the floored bacon and put it in her mouth.  Mommy’s gray hairs are fast appearing thanks to this one!

SIX

I have been really, really craving some alone time lately.  I am an INTJ on the Briggs Meyers personality scale, and that basically means “I Need To Just be alone sometimes for my sanity”.  Just kidding.  But it does mean that I am an introvert who recharges by being by my lonesome.  Which is really hard to do when you’ve got a family that includes young and hyper-demanding children.  Whom I love very much and would not trade for the world.  Just need a break from once in a while.

In the last two weeks, I have gotten the following exciting and fun opportunities to recharge:

1) One hour sans kids at the Public Library.  This pretty much is like winning the lottery for me.  I mean, going to the library alone. Never. Happens.  It was so invigorating.  I got to look at books without a devious toddler methodically playing snowplow with the books on the bottom shelf.  I got to read the summary on the back of a novel that looked interesting without my preschooler tugging my shirt and whining that this was boooooring.  I didn’t have to be embarrassed by the stern-looking adult book section librarian when my older two decided to illustrate their maturity to the masses by kicking each other and then announcing in very-unacceptable-for-the-library voices that it’s her/his fault, not mine!  Sigh.  Heavenly.

2) Annual lady exam at the gynecologist.  Well, the exam was not the rejuvenating experience to which I refer.  It was the waiting room.  Alone.  I got to read a magazine.

I guess I need to take what I can get!

SEVEN.

It was with great sadness that I heard about the latest terrorist attack.  In London, no less, where I anticipate going later this year.  With every fresh and horrific (and need I say, senseless) tragedy of this kind that occurs around the world there is an aura that we are not safe.  There is an insidious yet persistent scuttlebutt that fuels our worries: We are not safe when we travel, we are not safe when we are at home.  There is terror and mayhem lurking everywhere.  There is evil everywhere and there is no recourse for us.

Pretty much every time there is another extremist attack, another bombing or assailant driving a truck into crowds of people, my mother contacts me in fear and disgust.  Fear generally provokes her to say how crazy it seems to her that I want to travel to Europe. (I think she would be happier if I had announced I was going to sneak into and flamboyantly wave an American flag in North Korea).  Every new terror attack seems to cement in her mind that Europe is a dangerous, unstable place teaming with evil-minded religious zealots.  And she tries to make me feel nervous and bad about my decision to travel.

The truth is: travel will always be a bit dangerous.  It is fraught with risks.  But then again, so is life.  You have the option to embrace it, and open yourself to the opportunity for growth, or you can “play it safe” and stay home.  At home, you may never put yourself in the kind of situations where you might be unsafe, but expanding your horizons is a whole lot harder when you’re standing in one place.

So, that is my operative philosophy going forward.  I definitely hope and pray that a terror attack doesn’t ever affect my daily life or that of my loved ones.  I pray for the victims and for the souls and minds of the attackers who feel murder and mayhem is the answer.  But I am not cancelling my trip because it comes with risk (sorry, Mom!).  And, like wiser people have said before me, that the best way to stand up to terrorism is to show the terrorists that we will not be cowed by attempts to make us so.

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Have a wonderful week!

 

 

Get over here and fast: Lent at my house

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Talking to Hubby last night, I asked if he remembered the “rules” of fasting for this week’s Ash Wednesday observance.  This is probably the first year I have not been either pregnant or breastfeeding (and so excused from the fasting obligation) in a long while, so I obviously would be forgiven for being forgetful about what the Catholic Church means when they admonish one to fast.

(BTW: The USCCB website states:

“For members of the Latin Catholic Church, the norms on fasting are obligatory from age 18 until age 59. When fasting, a person is permitted to eat one full meal, as well as two smaller meals that together are not equal to a full meal.”

Okie dokie.)

Most of my non-Catholic friends are completely baffled by a religion that tells one, among other things, what to eat and when (fish on Fridays during Lent) and makes you quit eating for certain amounts of time!  Of course fast and abstinence during Lent has a whole lot more theological significance than just the acts themselves, for which some are needlessly wrapped up in the idea of “stuffy old men in Rome telling me what to do” (to paraphrase a beloved relation of mine).

Observing Lent (the 40 days leading up to Easter) has, in recent times, become the deepest spiritual experience of my entire year.  Because, for me, meditating upon the willing acceptance of Christ’s impending death (and, by association, His Resurrection) and how that coincides with my own existence is both strangely comforting and, at the same time, disturbing.

And disturbing it should be.  Lent is about suffering.  And sacrifice.  And realizing that all the wonderful gifts and blessings in our lives are not things we should ever take for granted.

If you are anything like me, we spend most of our year wrapped up in ourselves, our own lives, our own families, our own rushing around trying to get Something Accomplished.  The frustrations we feel and the difficulties we face during the year are needless nuisances.  They are unfair.  They make us mad.  We don’t know why they are happening to us.  We’re good people.  We don’t deserve this!  We soldier on, perhaps getting burnt out with our daily lives.  We are trying to Accomplish Something after all.  Once we get that raise, once we get that toddler potty-trained, once we take that trip, we will have Arrived.  Let’s hurry up and get there.  And in the meantime, we have Lost the Point. 

For me, Lent helps me to get back where I need to be.  To make God #1 in my life where he should be, instead of having fallen pretty dang far down the list.

With God, I know what my priorities are and my goals.  His goals, not the world’s goals.  I know what is expected of me as a wife, and mother, and woman.  I don’t have to fear suffering, because with God, suffering can become beautiful.  I sacrifice for Him (in my measly little fasting and abstaining from meat) in celebration of all that His Son did for us.  It may be difficult, but it is nothing compared to innocently suffering and dying for a lot of people who didn’t deserve it.

Lent becomes a time of “centering” for my spiritual life.  And with life as crazy as it is, I really need it.

So what do we do for Lent in my house?

Well, in addition to the obligatory fasting and abstinence, this year, we are braving the 7pm mass on Ash Wednesday as a family.  I can should be able to count on the kids to behave later than their 8pm bedtime so we can do this as a family.

Luckily, everyone really loves fish so coming up with appetizing meal plans for the Fridays during Lent is easy.

To strengthen my faith in the next 40 days, I have committed to saying a decade of the Rosary every day (which becomes surprisingly smooth after a few weeks) and also….eeek…giving up alcohol (this one is going to be hard!).   I figured I could do it for my babies when I was pregnant, I should be able (with God’s help) to do it for Him!  I will keep you posted on this one!

I am also going to try harder to offer up my daily “sufferings” and frustrations to the Lord.  I am hoping this will make me a less frazzled and resentful homemaker (I hope) and help me to express my love to my family better.  Again, I will let you know how that goes!

If you celebrate Lent, what are your traditions or commitments?

 

 

{7QuickTakes} in the midst of family dance party!!!!

So, it is Friday night and Hubby just called to say he has to stay late at work…ugh.  So I sit here with a glass of vino and KidzBop playing on the iPhone while the kiddos run around like banshees.  TGIF!  Here’s some more excitement akin to the party over at Kelly’s.

ONE.

Not gonna lie, some days parenting is hard.  Sometimes the kids are running around like banshees (oops, already mentioned that…mommy brain…) and you have a sinus infection and the LAST THING you wanna do is make another friggin’ peanut butter sandwich.  But then oldest daughter has to do her reading homework and decides it is a good idea to read to younger brother while channeling her first-grade teacher at storytime.  I had to smile.  So cute.

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TWO

I am not the most confident person in the world.  Luckily, as an adult I have been nowhere near where I was in that regard in high school!  However, I have been going through a rough patch lately.  I am just feeling…I don’t know….frumpy and uncool.  I think it has to do with it being February.  Not a fan of this month.  We’ve all been sick and stir-crazy and I am ready for spring!  But I think that since I’ve been fighting negativity on that front it has come over to bite me on the confidence front as well.  Nothing specific, just an overwhelming feeling of disliking myself.  This, too, shall pass, I know.

THREE.

But…but…something wonderful has happened to my sweet younger sis!  She is engaged!  Yay!  So happy for her and her young man.  We are looking forward to a fall wedding.

FOUR.

Since I suffer from depression, I have always been worried about my children ending up suffering from those sort of things as well.  My oldest, Junior, has always been extremely sensitive and intense.  This year he has been suffering from panic attacks and seems to experience anxiety that is really hard to get a handle on.  We have been in communication with his school counselor and she has been really great about teaching him relaxation techniques and just being available for him to visit with about his concerns.  However, it is scary when he gets so worked up that he can’t calm himself down.  He has especially been stressed-out this week about his upcoming karate testing and a school program where he has to memorize a speech.  It is really hard for me, as a parent, trying to help him through dealing with this anxiety, especially since he is only in 4th grade!  It seems too young to have the weight of the world on your shoulders.

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My favorite stress relief: the sunset out my back porch:-)

FIVE.

Bellie sat and watched the entire 3-episode special of Rick Steves’ Travel Skills television shows with me.  At first she was irritated that I wanted to watch that while I folded laundry (folding, which I hate…sometimes the only thing that gets me through is Rick Steves and wine), but then she was kind-of interested in the lovely locales Rick was visiting.  I think she was most impressed with the tiny Swiss alpine villages.  (I hope we can take the kids over there some day!)

SIX.

Oh the Trolls soundrack.  We have moved on from KidzBop.  Which I have something of an affinity for…I now have small ballerinas dancing to Anna Kendrick’s version of The Sound of Silence.

SEVEN.

I made a promise last weekend that I had to keep.  It was hard.

I let my kids do painting.

It was stressful.  It was messy.  Spike dumped an entire water cup of green-tinted water on the floor but did not seem concerned in the least.  I think they had fun.  And that is what motherhood is all about.

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I can’t resist making my children’s dreams come true.

Blessings for a great week ahead!

 

 

 

 

{7QuickTakes} Weekly mishmash: Vol. 15

I am feeling rather caught up in the whole “blahs of winter” right now.  It is still a little chilly, still a little wintry (although the ugly kind of winter, where the snow is partially melted and icy and dirty) and the sun plays hide and seek most days.  Add that to a severe cold…riiiiiiiiight after recovering sufficiently from the stomach flu….and I am feeling a little gloomy.

Of course it helps to remember that spring is in sight, that the blahs give away to warmer temperatures and being able to spend time outdoors without coats on.  So we soldier on…enjoy these Quick Takes and be sure to check out some more at Kelly’s !

ONE

I scored big at the Used Book Sale (referenced last week)!  Two giant piles of books for $8.00.  I am glad I brought along Junior, who helped me lug my treasures to my car.

TWO.

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Is this not the cutest Valentine ever?  I especially love the Quarter.  Not sure if the drawing is supposed to be of the Eiffel Tower or Big Ben, but I truly appreciated how the kids worked together to make this extremely thoughtful card.

THREE.

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I love this poster by Arnold Lobel

I have these really cute literary posters that I want to get framed and hang up in the kid’s “book corner”.  The problem is that they are odd sizes, and I am pretty sure I won’t be able to locate ready-made frames and will have to get them specially framed, which I hear is expensive.  I do want them framed, but wondering if there are cheaper options for odd specifications?  I am not very skilled at the whole DIY-thing so making the frames myself is probably not a great option.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

FOUR.

I am thrilled to be able to bring dinner to a friend and her husband who recently adopted a baby.  They have had dreams of parenthood for years and I am so happy that their prayers have been answered!  I am so awed by how the Lord works through adoption.  Adoption has definitely proven to be a  blessing in my own (extended) family.  My little niece is so fiercely loved.  Thanks be to God!

FIVE.

Sometimes you just want to rub a corn dog on your head. #Spikesgreatideas

SIX.

I had a weird dream last night where all these people were being assassinated at our house (thanks, I think to the Kim Jong Nam assassination).  But apparently Dream Me was less concerned about people meeting their deaths at my home than that fact affecting our social life.  “Nobody’s going to want to come to our house anymore,” Dream Me told Dream Hubby.

SEVEN.

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Castle Combe, a Cotswold Village in Wiltshire. Courtesy of Saffron Blaze, via http://www.mackenzie.co

Trying to make a final decision on a mini-bus tour from London.  In the running: Warwick Castle, Oxford and Stratford-Upon-Avon; some sort of Cotswolds-centric tour; and Dover, Leeds Castle, and Canterbury.  Any suggestions?  I love the extensive history of Warwick Castle (plus what historian doesn’t find Warwick the Kingmaker fascinating – I loved his portrayal in the White Queen miniseries).  The Cotswolds, of course, are delightfully English.  And I have always wanted to see the White Cliffs of Dover.  Also, one of my best friends used to live in Canterbury and I would love to see where St. Thomas à Becket was martyred.  Hard decisions when you’ve only got one day to devote to one of these tours!

Wishing you a blessed week!

 

{7QuickTakes} Weekly mishmash: Vol. 14

I couldn’t stop laughing at Kelly’s 2nd Capsule Wardrobe post!  There are more funny folks over there, be sure to check it out!

One.

This has been week numero dos for the Great Stomach Bug of 2017.  Every time I keep thinking the family is finally through it, somebody else vomits in my car.  I was feeling better myself and then, a week later, was sick again.  So far, Hubby and Evvie have not gotten it, but the incubation period seems to be about 7 days, so I am sure this time next week I will probably be needing to buy more bleach.

Two.

Hubby and I don’t generally make a big deal out of Valentine’s Day.  Hubby also doesn’t generally send me flowers, particularly not for specific holidays – he likes the element of surprise, he says (which, also, he says, has nothing to do with forgetting most of the time).  One day I told him, “Gifts are my Love Language.  I wish you would think about sending me flowers once in a while”  and then the joke became him telling me, “I thought about sending you flowers today.”  I would always nod appreciatively and say, “Thanks, It’s the thought that counts!”

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In an about face, eschewing just The Thought of Sending Flowers, I received these via delivery on Tuesday.  Along with the card (no signature, who could they be from?:-)  Which leads us to

Three.

After the delivery guy left, I asked Spike who he thought could have possibly sent me these beautiful flowers.

Spike: I don’t know!  The guy that just dropped them off??

Me:  But why would he do that?

Spike: ?? Because he loves you??

So, if that is not a testimony to all husbands out there to set an example by sending your wives flowers more often, I don’t know what is.  You don’t want the children thinking there are random flower delivery guys who love your wives more than you do!

Four.

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I have to remind myself to be grateful for the quiet moments when they are getting along courtesy of Netflix.

Five.

I like to try to make Valentine’s Day special for the kids.  This year my goal is to make them hand crafted Valentines, complete with personalized love notes and carefully selected candy.  Haha!  Just kidding.  It is more like I will scatter some Hershey’s kisses on the table Tuesday morning, while scrawling I Love Yous on Post-it Notes.  It’s the thought that counts.

Six.

As soon as Hubby gets home from getting a haircut we are planning to do a major Slash and Burn of the kids’ bedrooms.  It has gotten Out. Of. Control.  They are pits of despair.  Well, mainly, dirty laundry, misplaced bric-a-brac, and garbage.  Oh the garbage.  Apparently the physical act of getting trash into the proper receptacle is lost on my children.  Except Bellie.  Because, for Bellie, there is no such thing as Trash.  It is all art.  Or could be used in the future for art.  At any rate, it is NOT WORTHY OF BEING THROWN.  This is why I need to clean out her room in secret, or if she is at school.  Otherwise what generally happens is that she tearfully picks through the garbage bag, taking out every last worksheet and piece of candy wrapper, saying, “Don’t throw away my stuuuuuuuuufffff”  It is dramatic.  Garbage might just be her Love Language.

Seven.

My library holds quarterly book sales of donated used books and withdrawn library titles.  I am mildly obsessed with used books.  I honestly have no need for any additional reading material right now.  I honestly have no more bookshelf space for any additional reading material right now.  But, yet…I am trying to decide if I should head on down to the library this weekend.  Just to see.  Just to browse.  Many books are 50 cents!  I am Rebecca and I have a book problem.  Anyone else?

Have a fantastic week!

 

 

{7QuickTakes}Weekly mishmash: Vol.13

Good day to you!  I am sitting at a local coffeeshop – by myself (doesn’t that sound scandalous?) – and I am happy to get my 7QTs in today!  See more at Kelly’s!

ONE

Hubby got back from a business trip yesterday.  I was really happy to get him back.  So were the kids.  He was only gone 5 days, but it was a LOOOONNNNNGGGG 5 days.  (See below Quick Take)

TWO

Stomach bugs while (temporarily) single parenting suck.  Stomach bugs while single parenting especially suck when they only hit said temporarily single parent while the children being parented are their own boisterous, exuberant, curious, and healthy selves.  I am glad that I was not having to parent sick kids while being sick myself, but….still.  I’m a complainer.  Edit: Bellie came home from school sick today….so….this might be the beginning of a fun weekend.  At least Hubby is home!

THREE

Six months to EUROPE!!!!!!!  I am feeling like everything is falling into place and can barely contain my excitement.  I need to work on the guilt feelings, though.  I mean, I can hardly sneak off to a coffee shop by myself on a Friday morning for an hour leaving Hubby with the two little ones without feeling like a complete worthless human being who is shirking her family responsibilities!  I will have to explore this idea more in future posts.

FOUR

Loving Victoria on Masterpiece.  I do think Jenna Coleman is a bit too pretty to play the illustrious queen, but oh well.  I am slightly obsessed with the Victorian Era, so the costumes and the hairstyles are completely thrilling to me.  Plus I think Victoria (who interestingly enough, was against women’s suffrage) was one of the most influential and fascinating women in the history of our modern world.

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Jenna Coleman as Queen Victoria at her coronation.  (Courtesy pbs.org)

FIVE

My mom is doing better.  She came through her surgery (to repair her leg) just fine, and is currently on the mend.  Talking to her on the phone nowadays she seems to be back to her old self.  It will still be weeks before she is permitted to put weight on her leg, but she seems to be wheeling herself around her house just fine, and other than being confined to the ground floor of her home, is doing well.  I have taken the suggestion to call her often – and I have been touching base with her via text daily, calling every other day.  If nothing else, I hope that this whole experience has convinced her that her children really do care about her.  We were all forced to break out of our mental business to actually reach out and make an effort to keep in touch.

SIX

I’ve got a dear friend who is going through a divorce.

There has been a group of us who have been friends for a long time.  We did a Bible study about Catholic Apologetics several years back together; it was so enlightening and educational for us, plus it brought us closer together as friends.  It definitely ranks as one of the best experiences I’ve had, and I have always felt that those of us who participated share a special bond.

Our families have hung out often, our husbands have gone out for beers together and helped each other with home improvement projects.  Each year we go to Bear Lake, Utah camping as a group and traditionally spent Super Bowl Sunday together.  Our kids are all friends.

Over Christmas, one of the couples split up under tense circumstances.  We are friends with both of them.  We like and respect both of them and want what is best for their kids, and their family as a whole.    But my friends and I are having a hard time wishing them a DIVORCE.  Especially in light of Catholic teaching, which we studied together in detail all those years ago.  We are not privy to all the information about the circumstances of their separation, of course.  There seem to be some seemingly insurmountable obstacles for them to stay together.  But….still……ugh.

It’s a sad situation all around.  We have tried to be supportive of our friend without bashing her husband.  We have been praying for them.  A lot.  And I truly believe that God has a plan for their family.

Still, anyone have any words of wisdom about supporting a friend (couple?) who is going through a divorce?  What are our duties as Christian/ Catholic friends?  Friends who believe in and confess the sanctity of marriage, especially when both parties in a divorce proceeding are convinced there is no hope for their marriage?  I am struggling here!

SEVEN

Well, as I type this, I can’t avoid the obvious:  my cuticles are a horror.  Winter wreaks havoc on my hands!  The air is so dry here in Idaho that dry skin is a matter of fact, but in winter it takes it up a notch!  My poor kids have inherited my problem; Bellie’s hands are dry and red ALL WINTER LONG unless she remembers to always always wear gloves when she goes outside (which doesn’t usually happen).   All of my kids seem to suffer from excema (particularly on their cheeks) during the winter.  My solution: Eucerin is my friend.  I buy an industrial size of the tub at the beginning of the winter.

 

 

I hope all of you are keeping warm and protecting your skin this winter!  Have a delightful weekend!

Explorations great and small

The whole idea of the “one word” for the year as your overarching New Year’s resolution has intrigued me.  Not because I intentionally eschew resolutions, but because it does seem a simple way of creating a theme, or focus, maybe even a “mission statement” for the year ahead.

This year, my word is EXPLORE.

The most obvious incarnation of this word in my year ahead will be to travel parts of the world I have never explored before.  But the word also means “explore” in a more general sense: to see the familiar with new eyes.  To make a more thorough examination of my surroundings; to recreate the experience of being a tourist in my own town and region.

It struck me, one time when I was traveling to a distant area of our own country, that the people in this quaint, fascinating, and beautiful place actually got to live here all the time.  How cool, and how lucky for them!  I doubted they ever got sick of their adorable town, never took for granted the history that made up their communal understanding of who they were, never felt bored whenever they drove across town to Walmart, or longed to visit anywhere else.

But the truth is, familiarity gets the better of all of us.  No matter what fabulous location you may inhabit, or what lovely views you have out of your window every day, the vast majority of us eventually take it for granted.  It is human nature.  It’s easy to look past the sights you see each day amidst the routine of daily life.

Travel can help.  Every time I return from a trip, I am struck anew with how much I love where I live.  After having been a tourist for a few days or a week, I am still stuck in “tourist mode” and it seems that mentality transfers over for the next few days.  I think, “What do visitors find interesting about my town?”  and, “What would I write about in a guidebook to this place?”.  It helps me to refocus on the wonder and pleasure of my own “place I call home”.

Those of us who lack the means or time to travel can still experience this.  It takes a little more imagination, but trying to see things differently is the name of the game.  Is there some restaurant you’ve been dying to try?  A museum exhibit that you haven’t seen yet?  Maybe visit a new park and try to write a review in your mind of its best features and how you might recommend it to a friend?  Any places outside the city limits but within a short drive that might offer a great picnic spot or opportunity for a vigorous easy hike (hey, I’ve got energetic, yet easily tired – go figure – youngsters!)  What sites might you encourage out-of-town friends or relatives to visit?  Which places in town would rank as your “Must See” sights?  Blogger Shauna Fontaine at Days to Come has this great post that also has some great tips to get you thinking about that!

Another aspect of “explore” for me is also to spend a little more quality time with myself this year.  Through prayer/meditation I really would like to become a little more centered, a little more OK with myself, get a little better understanding of who it is God wants me to be.  Getting time to explore one’s own psyche is pretty difficult when chasing one’s kiddos around all day long, but I want to try to make it a priority this year.

explore

 

{7QuickTakes} Weekly mishmash: Vol 12

Lately it has been sort-of hit or miss with {7QT} but I’m here today!  Check out other more motivated bloggers at Kelly’s!

ONE.

Happy Inauguration Day!  There are Americans who are happy, Americans who are sad, Americans who are angry, and Americans who are resigned today.  But the point is, this is how democracy works.  This is how America works.  And I still think we have the greatest political system in the world.  Sometimes we don’t like the outcome of elections, or Congressional votes, or laws that are made.  And that’s OK.  Because we are able to disagree civilly, and work together to come to a compromise.  We can air our grievances, and work to change things we don’t like.  We are free to speak out.  And that’s pretty awesome because there are countries in the world who do not have that option.

At any rate, one of the paramount aspects of our political system is a peaceful transition of power (another thing many countries in the world do not have – hello Gambia).  So, like him or hate him, ecstatic or morose (or, I guess, the negligible percentage of Americans who just plain don’t care one way or the other about him according to the media), President Trump is the newest leader of this great nation and the amazing people within.

TWO.

I got a new phone.  I didn’t want to, my Samsung Galaxy III was working just fine, thank you.  Except for that I couldn’t get picture messages and it deleted all my contacts on me.  Hubby wanted to graduate from a 2000’s-era flip phone to something a little more sophisticated, for work, you know.  And since we were on different carriers, two different bills, two different kinds of coverage, we decided to simplify the matter by just getting matching phones.  Which is our romantic way of celebrating Valentine’s Day early.  (Isn’t that how the Millenials do it anyhow?  Skip the flowers & chocolates, opt for Apple products?)

THREE.

My baby turned 2 earlier this month.  Supposedly, she is our last one (according to Hubby, but I could easily be talked into another!) so I am going through the whole gamut of emotions relating to that and all my babies getting older.  Of course, kids growing older comes with its benefits obviously: they can strap themselves in the car, put on their own clothes, and can generally follow directions.  But, baby-lover that I am, I miss those days of little bundles sleeping all day and cuddling while breastfeeding.   I am getting more sleep these days, which is a plus.  But….still.  Sigh.

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Princess Evvie turned 2!

FOUR.

………….I am whisper-typing this, in case the Universe decides to play a trick on me….but I *think* I can claim victory on the Spike Potty Training journey.  He has been a trooper since Christmas, with accidents few and far between.  He really does excellent when we are out and about in town, it’s mainly when he is at home and distracted by tv or a complicated Lego creation that he sometimes forgets to go until it’s too late.  Yay!

FIVE

In just a few short weeks it will be….SIX MONTHS TO EUROPE!!!  More on that later.  So excited!!  It is really feeling more real now that everything is coming together, tickets have been purchased, reservations have been made.

moms-needtraveltoo

Coming soon!

SIX

One of the hardest things about living so far away from family is that you are not available to help in times of need.  Two days after Christmas, my mother fell and broke her leg really badly.  She is extremely independent and lives on her own, so this has caused her to completely reorder her life (including her willingness to ask for and receive help).  She is now recovering from a successful surgery but will be unable to bear weight on the offending limb for a few months.  In the meantime, my geographically-closer siblings have really stepped up to the plate and helped her with transport and shopping and stopping by to check on her morning and night.  My sister has taken on the bulk of this, for which I am really appreciative, because it is next to impossible for me to drop everything here and go there, what with kids in school, a husband on back-to-back business trips, as well as financial concerns.  It is hard feeling so impotent when it comes to helping out.  Anyone have any experience with this?  When you are unable to physically be there for someone, how can you Be There for someone?  Aside from sending money, what are some things I could do, both for my mother and my siblings who are taking on the responsibility for caring for her?

SEVEN.

Listening to Arianna Huffington’s Thrive on audiobook.

41a2znogcclIt is forcing me to think differently about our society’s definition of “success” as well as how to take better care of myself.  Huffington’s main mantra: Get enough sleep.  So I am trying.  The goal is to go to bed earlier so I can get up at 6 with the kids before school after getting a healthy 8 hours of sleep.  So far, so good.  I am hoping that in the long run I have more energy and am more focused.  Generally, I stay up late at night to “get stuff done”(which, incidentally, is what my mother always did growing up – and subsequently was a zombie all day) and then proceed to hit a slump shortly after lunch, where the world looks bleak and I am too tired to function.  Yesterday after 8 hours of sleep I didn’t feel that slump, which was awesome!  Hoping that will continue.  I will keep you posted.

Have a delightful week!  We’ll chat again soon!